You’ve got mail
Mummy’s read on…
Until today I may have been guilty of believing that it is just the mummy’s who suffer, who feel the guilt when you have to pull your child from a warm comfy bed, a deep sleep in fear of sabotaging the military precision morning routine. The train will not wait. Or when you have to leave them with Nanny & Grandad for longer than you choose to because of a work commitment. For the rush, rush, rush routine in a working week because you both have to and choose to work full-time.
Please don’t tut me Daddy bloggers, or readers who are of the male species. This is kind of an apology and a nod to you all. Please don’t hate me. I really enjoy listening to your views, a daddy’s take on a situation. It is true that we do often see the world of parenting quite differently however we are also so very alike. We share something in common. Our beautiful children. Our love for bringing them into the world. The need to share our world with them, to protect them to nurture them. To love them.
I love to see you sharing pictures on Instagram, Pinterest and your blogs. Honestly I do. I can see the love in your posts. I only wish there were more of you. Let’s bang that Daddy Blogger drum.
I see this guilt of parenting and upset in my own husband but if I’m honest not in many others, that will be because I don’t ask them or unlike us mummy’s they don’t talk about it like we do. Mr H misses out on so many of the classes, firsts, cute moments and memories Lil G and I make. Unlike me he doesn’t have the flexibility. The problem is boys you don’t say it out loud. I need to hear it. I know that it isn’t a discussion you have over a cocktail like us mummy’s. You share peanuts and pork scratchings over a beer! I hope that’s not too generalist. It’s certainly what Mr H does with his friends. Who doesn’t love a bag of pork scratchings?
This morning I bumped into a friend at the train station who due to work commitments was having to leave his 2 children for 2-days. He was having to rush their morning routine, leave them before 8am, with different grandparents to do the retrospective nursery runs all in the name of Work.
As I looked at him I could see the pain in his face,the guilt. It reminded me of my own guilt. Being a working parent is tough. Not every day and not every week but sometimes you are riddled with guilt. You feel like you are letting them down somehow. That is just isn’t fair life has to be so rushed. Seeing my friend struggling with his guilt made me think of all the other Daddy’s out there who are also struggling but unless caught off the cuff may not share their feelings.
I promise to ask you more, subtly of course but I will. If you need a shoulder to lean on or someone to eat pork scratchings with I will be that person. I am not expecting you to cry, to pour your heart out, but if you fancy a chat I’m your gal!